Must Watch TV and a Very Silly Machine

[Added 14.02: Here’s the link to THE BAD MOTHER’S HANDBOOK. For some reason it didn’t work before. Ah well. You have it now.]

Firstly, the must watch TV. Tonight, 9pm, ITV. It’s the hour and a half adaption of Kate Long’s THE BAD MOTHER’S HANDBOOK, starring Catherine Tate. I’m sure it’ll be brill. So watch it. Enough said.

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And what silly machine, you ask. This one. I was in a reputable department store with my girlfriend on Saturday and stumbled across it. Both being of a curious disposition, and not knowing what on earth it was (or what it did) we went and had a look. And had a go. And then felt very sick. For said girlfriend this state of feeling icky lasted all afternoon. I can definitely say that if I decided to buy a home exercise machine it would not be a vibrating one. I’m sure it’s very good at what it does though. Though to be fair, I’m not sure how it does it.

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Nik Perring is a short story writer, author, teacher of writing, and editor from the UK. His books include the widely celebrated Not So Perfect (Roastbooks, 2010), and A Book of Beautiful Words (2014). He co-wrote Freaks! (TFP/HarperCollins 2012), and A Book of Beautiful Trees is out in 2015.

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  1. Howdy Nik my man!I’ve used one of those recently for my bad back. It has multi-settings so you can have it on low/massage. Should only use for about 30 seconds at a time.Loads of different positions which help stretch and warm up tired and old muscles.It’s helped me with the lower back pain.

  2. Really??????? Well, perhaps it was just me and my girlie’s lack of reading instructions and just hopping on. Still, eugh!Great to hear from you btw Kev. And good news the sickatron can be used for good; not just an object of head-spinning, stomach-churning evil!Hope you’re well, fella.Nik.

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